Dumbest Survivor ever

Last night was a decent episode. Plus, I was conscious for the WHOLE thing. Can you believe that?! After they got rid of boogedy eyed ElizaBrandon, things are looking up. BTW, its a sad thing when a person's eye sockets are bigger than their cup size.

For reward, they did a schoolyard pick for teams, swam under, over, around, through, between, and other adjectives to a puzzle. They had to memorize the puzzle, swim back and recreate it. JasonSteve chose OzzyBonnie, of course. From then on, it was decided. So, for reward, they got to all go to an airconditioned library with a beautiful view and watch an ultra boring powerpoint. NO, WAIT, that was my "reward". For their reward, JasonSteve, OzzyBonnie, ErikJohn, and super hot, leopard print bikini KathleenPerverti all went to a little vilage and got stoned. As usual, EricJohn overdid it and puked outside the hut. When they got back and told the others, OzzyBonnie sounded a little too cocky and some got irritated.

For Immunity, they had to stand on the end of a log and hold their hand up in the air that was attached to a dumping bucket. I'm sure ospi will adopt this policy in the near future. The literature should read something like, "All students, regardless of ability, will raise their hands and at least look like they have a clue. Should they not be able to raise their hand, we will hire a person and pay them thirty thousand dollars a year to raise their hand for them." Speaking of NCLB, I am starting a campaign: OPLB (one president left behind).

AAAnnyyway, along the way, Probst offered several goodies for people to quit. Moron EricJohn gave up for a half a bowl of gummy worms. Toward the end, it was down to PervertiKathleen and JasonSteve. Probst offered up a platter of goodies to be shared by the tribe. JasonSteve, got everyone's word that they wouldn't vote him and then quit so they could get the food. What...a...dumbass. The only thing less valuable than the word of a Survivor contestant is the word of a used car salesman. I thought for sure he'd sealed his fate. JamesJerome stated, "I tot I wuz da dumbest Survivor ever. Huh, huh." I don't understand why they didn't tell PervertiKathleen to quit. It was never even mentioned.

Back at camp, they all planned on voting out JamesSteven, or so they thought. The tides turned and OzzyBonnie felt confident not to use the idol. She was voted out. I told her at the draft that Ozzy would have a big target on him and not make the final four because no one wants to go up against him. Survivor is not Darwinian; the fittest don't survive. It's more Parasitic; the weak ride along with their strong hosts until it's time to feed on them one last time. (In case you didn't notice, this is a FREKIN gem of knowledge you just read).

Hasta luego OzzyBonnie. Better luck next time.

Remember, take Survivor to work with you: Obviously, I do.